There is a cockroach under a glass on my kitchen counter. I captured him last night, and I'm still not quite sure what to do with him. I shrink from killing the creature. Besides, it's too large. The very thought of.... ugh. No.
I think I will slip a paper under the glass and then release it into the wild. Naturally, this means it will merely make its way back into the house, but oh well. If I meet him again, I'll just have to name him and set out his own pet dish by the sink.
Our friends are coming by this evening; Keith bought a new war game that he wants to demonstrate to his buddy.
I have beef stew and biscuits planned for dinner, and the pumpkin cookies that I made earlier. They turned out well and I have managed to limit myself to two cookies per day, which really is very good.
I had such a moving insight yesterday evening. It was of something very simple, and of something I already knew, but it just came together in a new way. I was reading this passage:
"However, I am not in search of honor for Myself. [I do not seek and am not aiming for My own glory.] There is One Who [looks after that; He] seeks [My glory], and He is the Judge.
I assure you, most solemnly I tell you, if anyone observes My teaching [lives in accordance with My message, keeps My word], he will by no means ever see and experience death.
The Jews said to Him, Now we know that You are under the power of a demon (insane). Abraham died, and also the prophets, yet You say, If a man keeps My word, he will never taste of death into all eternity.
Are You greater than our father Abraham? He died, and all the prophets died! Who do You make Yourself out to be?
Jesus answered, If I were to glorify Myself (magnify, praise, and honor Myself), I would have no real glory, for My glory would be nothing and worthless. [My honor must come to Me from My Father.] It is My Father Who glorifies Me [Who extols Me, magnifies, and praises Me], of Whom you say that He is your God."
John 8:50-54, AMP
So, I read this, and I thought, when they asked Him who He was, why did He respond as He did? He didn't answer them straight out. I've actually wondered this many times before. (Though He does eventually declare that before Abraham existed, I AM. Which is a spine tingling thing to hear Him say.)
Then I realized that He could have declared to them who He is. He is the Son of God! He could have suddenly called down legions of angels, He could have made the earth shake or stopped the winds or thrown the Temple to rubble, if He wished.
Instead, He says that He will not glorify Himself, for that would mean nothing, would be worthless. He rests completely in the knowledge that His glory comes from His Father alone, as a gift. Jesus stays faithful to the message His Father sent Him to give.
Then I realized that He is meek. I never saw that aspect of His personality in quite that way before. Now I see it. He defers constantly, continuously, to His Father, His Father's message and His Father's work.
He is not in search of honor for Himself! What a statement for the Son of God to say. Astoundingly, despite His high position, power and glory His Father's given Him, He is, by character, meek and humble of heart. That is how He describes Himself.
Then, I searched out other verses, and they made this incredible picture (no doubt heavily influenced by Handel's Messiah!)-
"My servant grew up in the Lord’s presence like a tender green shoot, like a root in dry ground. There was nothing beautiful or majestic about his appearance, nothing to attract us to him.
He was despised and rejected— a man of sorrows, acquainted with deepest grief. We turned our backs on him and looked the other way. He was despised, and we did not care."
Isaiah 53:2-3
"The Sovereign Lord has given me his words of wisdom, so that I know how to comfort the weary. Morning by morning he wakens me and opens my understanding to his will. The Sovereign Lord has spoken to me, and I have listened. I have not rebelled or turned away.
I offered my back to those who beat me and my cheeks to those who pulled out my beard. I did not hide my face from mockery and spitting. Because the Sovereign Lord helps me, I will not be disgraced.
Therefore, I have set my face like a stone, determined to do his will. And I know that I will not be put to shame."
Isaiah 50:4:7
"He always had the nature of God, but he did not think that by force he should try to remain equal with God. Instead of this, of his own free will he gave up all he had, and took the nature of a servant. He became like a human being and appeared in human likeness. He was humble and walked the path of obedience all the way to death— his death on the cross.
For this reason God raised him to the highest place above and gave him the name that is greater than any other name. And so, in honor of the name of Jesus all beings in heaven, on earth, and in the world below will fall on their knees, and all will openly proclaim that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father."
Phillipians 2:6-11 GNT
It was as though I had a sudden glimpse right into His heart, and it just took my breath away. It just astounded me. It made me worship Him in loving adoration.
I think He loves to be found out, He loves to be searched out, to be required above all else. It must be, because all through the Bible it says to seek your God with all your heart and He will be found by you, and then cleave to Him.
Recently, as I was reading the Gospel of John, I remembered something I had read about ealier, (I forget where) concerning John. Jesus loved all His disciples. (Duh!) He didn't love John more; there's no way He could love any of us any more than He already does. His love for each of us is overflowing and uniquely expressed for us- that is, He has a unique relationship with each of us. Each of us is irreplaceable to Him.
What John did was to claim Jesus's love as his own identity. So, when John wrote his Gospel, he referred to himself as "the disciple Jesus loved" because that was the identity most important to John, and all his life, he never forgot that love. Which is a beautiful act of worship, I can't help but think.
It's right there, that identity belongs to all of us. We can claim it, we can make ourselves at home in it, as Jesus invites us to do.
We could sign all our letters, "the person Jesus dearly loves," with impunity. We could even answer telephone calls with it, if we liked: "This is the girl Jesus dearly loves speaking, how can I help you today?"
How would that be, for a conversation starter? We'd have to watch out, though, or we'd end up constantly referring to ourselves in the third person, and that might be a little confusing.
Anyway, the housewife Jesus dearly loves has to go and clean the bathroom before the house guests arrive, so I'd better finish this up... :)
