Often I considered sharing it. It seemed like it would be easy to share. Now that I know Jesus wants me to give it away, it no longer appears in any way easy to do.
This always happens. It always seems easy at first- from far off- and gets more difficult the closer I get to releasing it.
Each thing I share is one step. The one step often requires all the faith and strength that Jesus has given me so far. I take that step, rest a while, and then there is the next step, and it stretches me again.
Some time ago, Jesus caused me to stop and look back at when I began, and to consider where I was.
Do you see? Jesus asked me.
"Yes, I do. If I hadn't been faithful to take that first step, I would be unable to do what You are asking now."
As I was considering this next blog post, I saw it in a new way. The weight of this caused me to bend forward and I put my face in my hands.
"Holy, holy, holy," I whispered, in awe. There was no way it was possible for me to write about it. It shocked me that it even happened. "Dear God. Dear Jesus. How do I do this? I can't do this."
Apart from Me, you can do nothing, Jesus reminded me.
"Oh, thank God! Of course! Of course I'm not enough for this. I was not meant to be. I need only abide- You will flow through me."
I have sanctified Myself, that you might be sanctified, Jesus said gently.
As He spoke, I remembered that passage:
"They are not of the world (worldly, belonging to the world), [just] as I am not of the world.
Sanctify them [purify, consecrate, separate them for Yourself, make them holy] by the Truth; Your Word is Truth.
Just as You sent Me into the world, I also have sent them into the world.
And so for their sake and on their behalf I sanctify (dedicate, consecrate) Myself, that they also may be sanctified (dedicated, consecrated, made holy) in the Truth."
John 17:16-19
The relief of remembering this was exquisite. I put my hand out and leaned against the wall, feeling a hundred times lighter.
"Thank You," I breathed. "Thank You. I will abide in You, in Your sanctifying work, which You did on my behalf. Without You, I could do nothing and would be stuck fast and blind, but thank God for You."
My word for last year was love. I thought this was an annoyingly humdrum word and I wished I'd been given something more poetic, but that's what I had.
This year, my word is reveal.
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"The secret [of the sweet, satisfying companionship] of the Lord have they who fear (revere and worship) Him, and He will show them His covenant and reveal to them its [deep, inner] meaning."
Psalm 25:14 AMP